


This Is So Sad, Luka Play Despacito

by MoonbornChild



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: I'll add characters and ships as they appear, Multi, also other ships as i decide to include them, assuming this story gets a good enough reception i decide to continue it, chat fic, chatfic, rose and juleka will be the focus in later chapters, welcome back to matchmaking with alix (and also luka)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-12
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-06-26 02:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15653988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonbornChild/pseuds/MoonbornChild
Summary: Sometimes the best way to cope with your city being constantly destroyed is memes.(The rating is for language, nothing else.)





	1. Luka and Alix Are Lying Scoundrels

**Author's Note:**

> Sooooo this is my first attempt at something silly in a while, so hopefully it's funny. If y'all like it, let me know cause I'm probably not gonna write more unless people seem interested.
> 
> Couple notes: the group chat in this chapter is for the art club and their friends (except Marc cause they need to tease Nathaniel about his crush), so  
> Alix - GottaGoFast  
> Juleka - LETSGOLESBIANS  
> Rose - PinkFairy  
> Marinette - Fashionista  
> PrinceEric - Kim (he loves his gf guys :,))  
> Gaymer - Max  
> IHaveAnxietyJanet - Nathaniel  
> UrAnAllStar - Luka

**LETSGOLESBIANS** has added **UrAnAllstar** to **Michelangelo Was A Punk Ass Bitch**

 **IHaveAnxietyJante:** Juleka, why

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** Luka Nathaniel doesn’t know how to bi

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** Give him ur wisdom

 **UrAnAllStar:** isn’t your class full of bi ppl

 **UrAnAllStar:** like rose?

 **UrAnAllStar:** rose ur bi right?

 **PinkFairy:** Yep!

 

Private message between **LETSGOLESBIANS** and **UrAnAllStar**

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** illkillyou.png

 **UrAnAllStar:** lmao

 

**Michelangelo Was A Punk Ass Bitch**

**Gaymer:** There is a statistically unlikely amount of bi people in our class, yes

 **Gaymer:** But considering there’s a 92% chance Nathaniel’s crush has a similar style to you (re: black nail polish) we thought your input would be useful

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** oh my god

 **UrAnAllStar:** wait does this person go to ur school

 **PrinceEric:** ya

 **UrAnAllStar:** you have a thing for marc???

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** OH MY GOD

 **Fashionista:** I KNEW IT

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** oh yeah i guess i forgot to mention that

 **UrAnAllStar:** we met in the hot topic and bonded over nailpolish and makeup

 **UrAnAllStar:** he steals all my fukcin mascara

 **Fashionista:** wait rly?

 **UrAnAllStar:** not on purpose we just like the same brand so he he keeps accidentally taking mine

 **UrAnAllStar:** nath u like a scene gay. Now u gotta get a fake tail and put it on ur belt

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** what

 **GottaGoFast:** PLS

 **GottaGoFast:** I WILL PAY CASH

 **UrAnAllStar:** kidding

 **UrAnAllStar:** send me a pic tho i need to know if ur his type

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** id rly rather not do that

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** hes the redhead in my school photo

 **UrAnAllStar:** OH

 **UrAnAllStar:** YOURE THAT T{WUBU

 **GottaGoFast:** can someone translate pls

 **Fashionista:** Excitement™

 **GottaGoFast:** thnxs

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** ???

 **PrinceEric:** WHAT DOES HE KNOW THAT WE DONT

 **UrAnAllStar:** ur that guy he makes the comic book w right

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** yeah

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** he hates me doesn’t he

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** he never forgave me for being an asshole and getting him akumatized and he’s only working with me on the comic cause he doesn’t have any other options for an artist

 **UrAnAllStar:** what

 **UrAnAllStar:** no

 **GottaGoFast:** I told you he didn’t hate you!

 **UrAnAllStar:** marc thinks ur super cool actually

 **UrAnAllStar:** im not supposed to say anything but if u asked him out i think it would go well

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** oh

 **PinkFairy:** yay! I have to go help my parents, but im glad to hear the good news!

 **PinkFairy** is offline

 **Fashionista:** VICTORY!  
**GottaGoFast:** not yet i think

 **GottaGoFast:** so u gonna ask him out nath?

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** no??

 

Private Message between **UrAnAllStar** and **GottaGoFast**

 **GottaGoFast:** hey

 **GottaGoFast:** so when nath got akumatized he had a crush on marinette and like

 **GottaGoFast:** legit ignored hawkmoth for her until he thought she’d been scheming with chat noire behind his back

 **GottaGoFast:** instantly went back to regular akuma behavior

 **UrAnAllStar:** y r u telling me this

 **UrAnAllStar:** besides convincing me hes nice enough for marc

 **GottaGoFast:** he gets jealous

 **UrAnAllStar:** nice

 **UrAnAllStar:** can u tell mari that what im abt to do isnt personal

 **GottaGoFast:** yeah but dude shes super into adrien

 **UrAnAllStar:** who isnt

 **UrAnAllStar:** just let me have my dreams that theyre poly or smthn

 **GottaGoFast:** k

 

Private Message between **GottaGoFast** and **Fashionista**

 **GottaGoFast:** hey luka wants u to know the stunt hes about to pull is for show

 **Fashionista:** what?

 **GottaGoFast:** also i think hes into both u and adrien so have fun w that

 **Fashionista:** WHAT?

 

**Michelangelo Was A Punk Ass Bitch**

**UrAnAllStar:** so ur not gonna ask him out

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** i mean i want to

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** but ill screw it up or even if he says yes ill be a shit bf

 **Fashionista:** as an akuma you literally ignored hawkmoth on a quest to have a romantic date with me

 **Fashionista** : you didnt threaten me or anything you just asked and used your evil powers to made a candelit boat ride for us

 **Fashionista:** you didnt go after chloe cause i asked you to

 **Fashionista:** as. an. AKUMA.

 **Fashionista:** and now youre telling me youd be a bad bf?

 **PrinceEric:** holy shit

 **GottaGoFast:** go off mari

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** hhhhhhh but im not my akuma and that doesnt say anything about like, long term relationships?

 **GottaGoFast:** i mean ya u both having anxiety wont make it easy but yall wouldnt have managed to work so well together on ur comic if u couldnt communicate

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** okay but what if i still screw it up or he realizes when i ask him out that hes still mad about the have reverser incident

 **UrAnAllStar:** so ur not gonna ask him out?

 **UrAnAllStar:** cause i found this super cute lipgloss ik he’ll like and i gotta go get my mascara back from him anyways

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** what do u mean by that?

 **UrAnAllStar:** i mean that hes cute and if the boy hes always going on about isnt gonna make a move then im gonna

 **UrAnAllStar:** jul doesnt one of ur friends families own a resturant

 **PrinceEric:** my family runs a vietnamese place and mari’s run a bakery

 **UrAnAllStar:** cool do u need reservations for ur place kim

 **PrinceEric:** nah its not usually too busy

 

Private message between **GottaGoFast** and **IHaveAnxietyJanet**

 **GottaGoFast:** u just gonna let him do that?  
**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** i dont even know if hes marcs type

 **GottaGoFast:** what if hes rly pretty

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** he better not be

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** there are enough pretty ppl around me my bisexual heart cant take anymore

 

Private message between **UrAnAllStar** and **GottaGoFast**

 **GottaGoFast:** send a selfie in the chat

 **UrAnAllStar:** cool

 

**Michelangelo Was A Punk Ass Bitch**

**UrAnAllStar:** didmymakeup.png

 **UrAnAllStar:** im thinking this outfit, thoughts?

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** FYEWB@QYBYU@QBIKFY@GB

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** SOMEONE PLS JUST KILL ME

 **UrAnAllStar:** so yeah i should wear it?

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** NO

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** YOU STAY RIGHT THERE FUCK IT IM GONNA TRY

 **UrAnAllStar:** go for it im not too gone on him

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet** is offline

 **Fashionista:** ...well played

 **UrAnAllStar:** thnx

 **GottaGoFast:** wouldnt have happened without me

 **GottaGoFast:** ty tho luka theyve been dancing around each other ever since they met

 **GottaGoFast:** the art club already has one pair of pinning idiots

 **UrAnAllStar:** yeah speaking of that

 **UrAnAllStar:** i might need ur help w smthn

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** luka i stg

 **UrAnAllStar:** ;)

 **GottaGoFast:** im in

 **PrinceEric:** well that was wild from start to finish

 **PrinceEric:** anyone know what marc likes i feel like he and nath r gonna show up at my family’s place soon

 **Fashionista:** pho i think, he likes spicy things

 **PrinceEric:** sweet

 **UrAnAllStar:** i am thnx for noticing

 **Gaymer:** I honestly did not predict this chain of events at all, but I’m glad the matter worked out for the best!

 **UrAnAllStar:** just call me the king of romance

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** pls dont

 **Gaymer:** I suggest we add him to the class group chat! He may be of some assistance.

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** if by assistance do u mean he writes sappy love songs about any pretty person whose nice to him

 **UrAnAllStar:** yeah like u dont write dramatic poetry abt ur crush

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** SHUT

 **GottaGoFast:** add him i need him for my Plot

 **GottaGoFast:** also lbr naths gonna add marc too

 **PrinceEric:** do you guys really think so? Hes usually pretty private

 **PinkFairy:** Nathaniel just came by my family’s flower shop and bought of whole bouquet!! He was so shy about it! I just know it’s going to go well :D

 **GottaGoFast:** pretty sure

 **PrinceEric:** ill go ahead and add luka

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** my life is simply a train of endless suffering


	2. How Many People Have a Thing for Marinette (hint: a lot)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well people seemed interested so here we are. Thank you to everyone who commented!
> 
> PrinceEric - Kim  
> ProGaymer - Max  
> DJKing - Nino  
> WifiQueen - Alya  
> PinkFairy - Rose  
> GottaGoFast - Alix  
> GingerBee - Sabrina  
> GentleGiant - Ivan  
> LeadActress - Mylene  
> Fashionista - Marinette  
> Adrien - Adrien  
> QueenBee - Chloe  
> LETSGOLESBIANS - Juleka  
> IHaveAnxietyJanet - Nathaniel  
> UrAnAllstar - Luka

**PrinceEric** has added **UrAnAllStar** to **The Gang Gets Akumatized**

 **WifiQueen:** whomst

 **PrinceEric:** julekas brother luka

 **UrAnAllStar:** i think i just got nath a bf

 **UrAnAllStar:** ur welcome

 **GottaGoFast:** hell yeah

 **DJKing:** idk if you should be excited yet

 **DJKing:** bff of the stupid romantic means u get to do all kinds of stupid stuff

 **Adrien:** I can confirm that.

 **Adrien:** “Adrien what do you think of this song? Would Alya like it?”

 **DJKing:** aw come on man :(

 **Adrien:** “Adrien listen to the third version of the mixtape I’m making for her and tell me if it’s good.”

 **WifiQueen:** I loved it btw <3

 **DJKing:** <3

 **GottaGoFast:** DISGUSTING

 **QueenBee:** I can’t believe I agree w/ Alix on something

 **DJKing:** im just taking advantage while i can

 **DJKing:** cause youve already informed me im holding the boombox for ur future partner adrien

 **WifiQueen:** adrien omg pls tell me youre not gonna try and serenade someone through their open window

 **Adrien:** Why not?

 **PinkFairy:** aw thats so sweet! I love romance

 **UrAnAllStar:** yeah...such a shame theres no one madly in love w u in ur class…

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** hey guys today my brother pushed me so im starting a kickstarter to put him down

 **Adrien:** rose i thought u had a thing w the prince?

 **PinkFairy:** turns out he has a crush on a girl in his home country : (

 **PinkFairy:** he was really sweet about it though!!!

 **GentleGiant:** oh, hi luka

 **UrAnAllStar:** whats up my guy

 **GentleGiant:** mylene and i are trying to find Andre’s cart again

 **LeadActress:** it’s been a couple of hours…

 **LeadActress:** but it’s our friday tradition! We won’t give up yet!

 **UrAnAllStar:** ah ive never been there

 **UrAnAllStar:** i hear its super good tho

 **Fashionista:** you should go with us sometime!!!

 **UrAnAllStar:** id love to go w u

 **Fashionista:** DUIQEWBDIQ

 **Fashionista:** I MEAN LIKE

 **Fashionista:** PLATONICALLY

 **UrAnAllStar:** aw

 **UrAnAllStar:** still sounds like fun

 **WifiQueen:** lmao mari how many guys r u gonna attract

 **Fashionista:** i dont attract guys!! or girls actually which is a shame

 **WifiQueen:** raise ur hand if youve ever felt personally victimized by mari being too dang attractive

 **PinkFairy:** she’s really nice okay!!! I like that in a person!

 **DJKing:** count me in

 **PrinceEric:** shes pretty cute

 **WifiQueen:** tbh girl when i first saw u i was kinda attracted

 **WifiQueen:** but now i know all ur secrets and flaws

 **Fashionista:** alya why

 **GottaGoFast:** we all know nath had a thing for u

 **GottaGoFast:** also my demi ass has had crushes on like three ppl ever so congrats for making the cut

 **Fashionista:** what is my life? Im not that attractive?

 **UrAnAllStar:** yes you are? Youre super brave and kind and rly cute tbh

 **Adrien:** I mean, you are pretty cute Marinette.

 **WifiQueen:** HOLY SHIT

 **Fashionista:** uh

**Fashionista is now offline.**

**Adrien:**???

 **Gaymer:** press f to pay respects

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** f

 **PrinceEric:** f

 **UrAnAllStar:** f

 **WifiQueen:** f

 **GottaGoFast:** f

 **Adrien:** f

 **Adrien:** Seriously though what just happened?

 **QueenBee:** i cant believe she got that embarrassed even though you were just messing with her omg

 **Adrien:** Chloe…

 **QueenBee:** wait you were SERIOUS?

 **DJKing:** uh chloe adrien thinks like half our class is cute

 **QueenBee:** WHAT

 **GingerBee:** this means theres nothing to worry about! He doesnt feel anything in particular for her!

 **DJKing:** actually he thinks shes probably the cutest in the class

 **Adrien:** Nino shush.

 **WifiQueen:** wait does he have the cutest classmates ranked?

 **Adrien:** NO

 **DJKing:** ahahaha about that

 **GottaGoFast:** holy shit

 **UrAnAllStar:** this class is way more interesting than mine

 **WifiQueen:** what are the rankings? The people demand answers!

 **DJKing:** cant say! Bros honor sorry

 **WifiQueen:** bleh fine

 **WifiQueen:** but i WILL find out!

 **Adrien:** You can try.

 **WifiQueen:** nath is #2 right?

 **Adrien:** …

 **Adrien:** Fuck.

 **WifiQueen:** AHAHAHAHA

 **WifiQueen:** I KNEW YOU HAD A TYPE!

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** whats the type

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** im just curious

 **PinkFairy:** ooh! I wanna know too!

 **WifiQueen:** artsy ppl with cool hair

 **WifiQueen:** also bravery and kindness i think

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** HUH

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** INTERESTING

 **UrAnAllStar:** I Have Done Nothing Wrong Ever In My Entire Life

 **Adrien:** Even I know that’s not true.

 **UrAnAllStar:** ok so when alya runs into an akuma attack w camera shes an intrepid reporter and brave soul

 **UrAnAllStar:** but when i set the kitchen on fire one time for a music video im “gonna burn the boat down” and “need to call the fire department”

 **LETSGOLESBIANS:** we had to air the boat out for an hour

 **PinkFairy:** i thought it was cool!

 **UrAnAllStar:** ART

**IHaveAnxietyJanet is online**

**WifiQueen:** OMG

 **GottaGoFast:** YOU SUMMONED HIM

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** wtf

 **GottaGoFast:** luka said art and then u appeared

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** o

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** anyways im adding my bf

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet** has added **MotherfuckinRainbows** to **The Gang Gets Akumatized**

 **UrAnAllStar:** HECK YEAH!

 **GottaGoFast:** YOU DID IT THANK GOD!

 **MotherfuckinRainbows:** hi?

 **MotherfuckinRainbows:** this is a lot of ppl

 **Fashionista:** dw theyre all friendly and congrats!!

 **MotherfuckinRainbows:** ty!! He brought me flowers it was rly sweet

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** kim is it cool w u if we come get some food at ur place?

 **PrinceEric:** heck yeah man! Tell me what u want and when ull be here and itll be ready for u

 **MotherfuckinRainbows:** r u sure u dont mind?

 **PrinceEric:** marc we r friends. bros even

 **MotherfuckinRainbows:** F IKHEBK@$B

 **GottaGoFast:** let me guess

 **GottaGoFast:** did nath just whisper two bros sittin in a hot tub

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** five feet apart cause theyre not gay

 **UrAnAllStar:** i love this fuckin family

 **PrinceEric:** o pls ill hug my friends also you ARE gay (or bi or pan idk)

 **MotherfuckinRainows:** gay. that doesnt bother anyone does it?

 **GottaGoFast:** no worries! even the bullies at this school dont bother ppl for being gay

 **WifiQueen:** its cause of chloe. i caught her threatening a couple of ppl who were making gay jokes

 **Fashionista:** wait really?

 **QueenBee:** o pls im not a monster. if ur gonna bother someone it should be cause they deserved it

 **Adrien:** Chloe that’s such a nice thing to do!

 **GottaGoFast:** i mean kinda

 **PrinceEric:** uh guys? food?

 **IHaveAnxietyJanet:** we’re almost there well just tell you when we get there

 **PrinceEric:** sounds good!

 **Gaymer:** Kim.

 **PrinceEric:** yeah?

 **Gaymer:** Don’t play romantic music, or give them candles, or anything else of that nature.

 **PrinceEric:** aw :(. ondine likes that tho!

 **Gaymer:** 96% odds these two wont appreciate it and will just feel awkward

 **GottaGoFast:** yeah nath’s a massive introvert dont do that

 **PrinceEric:** alright but im comping their dessert

 **Gaymer:** That should be fine! Thank you Kim.

 **PrinceEric:** i trust u :)

 **DJKing:** friendship is great

 **DJKing:** and on that note @UrAnAllStar ADRIEN THINKS UR HOT

 **Adrien:** NINO NO

 **DJKing:** YOU DIDNT SWEAR ME TO SECRECY THAT TIME

 **WifiQueen:** THE RUMOR COME OUT

 **UrAnAllStar:** so blessed. so grateful. cant believe this is my life.

 **Adrien:** ninoooooo

 **GottaGoFast:** now we know what it takes to make adrien stop using proper grammar


	3. Why Do Crushes Cause So Much Damage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for how long it's been since the last upload. I'm at college now so I'm pretty busy!

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** I JUST REALIZED WHEN I GOT UNAKUMATIZED FUCKIN CAT NOIR GRABBED ME AND I WAS TOO OUT OF IT TO PROPERLY APPRECIATE THAT

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** granted i was like freaking out about the falling thing and also the akumatization

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** also nath who i am far more into tbh. Chat noir is super attractive but does he like art and buy me flowers? no

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** have i already told you how fuckin nice naths hands are like he let me paint his nails and now they look super pretty and idk if it was just an excuse to hold my hand or not but either way mari i fuckin died

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** and then sometimes hell like lean into me to show me what hes working on and aaaaaAAAAAAAAAA

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** hes so great and i cant believe he asked my out but like am i moving too fast? How is this both the best and most stressful thing

**DJKing:** uh dude idk how to break this to u but this isnt ur and maris personal chat

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** FBEIUQ@BR@IQ

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** pls kill me

**MotherfuckinRainbows is offline**

**WifiQueen:** gdi i cant believe i missed that

**GottaGoFast:** oh shit is he alright?

**Fashionista:** he’s fine, just embarrassed. i managed to get ahold of him before class

**Gaymer:** I am starting to suspect being attracted to Chat Noir is just a universal gay experience.

**UrAnAllStar:** bi guys too i think

**DJKing:** i second luka

**DJKing:** **@Adrien @IHaveAnxietyJanet** what about u two? attracted to chat noir at all?

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** hes the reason i had a sexuality crisis brb gotta find my bf

**GottaGoFast:** YOU CAN’T JUST SAY THAT AND THEN VANISH

**Adrien:** I mean, yeah, he is pretty good looking. Luka, you said you thought so too?

**UrAnAllStar:** hes rly nice and brave which are legit traits. Also he could kill me and id say thanks

**DJKing:** ...what was that crashing sound?

**WifiQueen:** ADRIEN FELL DOWN THE FUCKIGN STAIRS BRB

**DJKing:** shit omw

**GottaGoFast:** me too well finish this convo later

**UrAnAllStar:** fuck text me the situation once youve got him to the infirmary or wherever

 

**PinkFairy:** HEY WAIT A MINUTE WERE YOU ALL BEING BI WITHOUT ME?

**UrAnAllStar:** hey rose, class going alright?

**PinkFairy:** yeah, but adrien broke his nose so his bodyguard came and picked him up. I hope he feels better soon : (

**UrAnAllStar:** i heard, we texted a bit earlier before his shit dad took his phone

**DJKing:** i would fight gabriel agreste for one (1) dollar

**WifiQueen:** lmk if u need someone to record for posteritys sake or just an extra fist

**PinkFairy:** yeah, fuck him up!

**UrAnAllStar:** HOLY SHIT

**PinkFairy:** :)

**UrAnAllStar:** rose pls be my sister in law

**PinkFairy:** juleka and i arent dating though

**UrAnAllStar:** yeah wild

**GottaGoFast:** so rose, u wanted in on the bi party, do u think chat noirs hot?

**PinkFairy:** hmmm...sort of! Im mostly into girls but hes very nice and i always think dark clothing is very attractive

**UrAnAllStar: @GottaGoFast** i cant make this shit up

**PinkFairy:** ???

**UrAnAllStar:** alix is helping me w some art for the band dw bout it

**PinkFairy:** okay!

**Fashionista:** hey luka if you also need my help with...art...lmk

**UrAnAllStar:** u do realize how flirty that sounds ya?

**Fashionista:** SHIT IT DOES

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** i log in and am instantly filled w rage at my brothers bs

**PinkFairy:** oooo luka what are you up to now?

**UrAnAllStar is offline**

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** smooth

**PinkFairy:** ???

**Fashionista:** hey, btw, rose, juleka! theres a new restaurant that opened near my bakery, apparently they have live jazz music on fridays! do you two want to go w me

**PinkFairy:** oh, sure, that sounds like fun!

Private Message between  **LETSGOLESBIANS** and  **Fashionista**

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** what are you doing?

**Fashionista:** what??? Im just organizing a fun outing with my friends!!

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** oh, alright if you say so. Thank you for inviting us

Private Message between  **GottaGoFast** and  **Fashionista**

**GottaGoFast:** youre gonna come up with some excuse to not go at the last minute so they’re alone, arent you?

**Fashionista:** yep!

**GottaGoFast:** youre getting better at this. compared to reverser at least lol

**Fashionista:** oh god dont remind me i still feel bad about that

**GottaGoFast:** speaking of marc did u and nath manage to calm him down

**Fashionista:** uh sorta? last i saw nath dragged him off somewhere

**GottaGoFast:** uh hopefully thats a good sign

**UrAnAllStar** is online

**UrAnAllStar:** JULEKA IS HOME AND SHES GONNA KILL ME SEND HELP FUABUEGW

**LETSGOLESBAINS:** WHERE R U HIDING

**UrAnAllStar:** NOT TELLING

**LETSGOLESBAINS:** ARE YOU A MAN OR A DOG

**UrAnAllStar:** IM NOT FALLING FOR THAT SHIT AGAIN

**WifiQueen:** wait you fell for that at one point?

**UrAnAllStar:** I was twelve

**Adrien** is online

**Adrien:** I got my phone back! I told my dad I needed to text someone about a group project. Plus I practiced piano for hours.

**UrAnAllStar:** ADRIEN U MIGHTY HERO SAVE ME

**Adrien:** Why are you calling me a mighty hero? I'm just a model!

**UrAnAllStar:** listen I just need someone to save me from my sister and so far everyone else who is online doesn't care

**Adrien:** oh I can help!

**Adrien: @LETSGOLESBIANS** He told me that when you're hunting him down he hides under your bed.

**LETSGOLESBAINS:** LUKA

**UrAnAllStar:** adrien why

**UrAnAllStar** is offline

**LETSGOLESBAINS** is offline

**DJKing:** top ten anime betrayals

**Fashionista:** it always surprises me how different juleka acts over text. I guess she's just less nervous which is good!

**IHaveAnxietyJanet** is online

**GottaGoFast:** NATH

**Fashionista:** is marc okay?? Where did u two go?

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** yeah we just went to his house and he showed me how to do makeup

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** i think hes better now

**Fashionista:** im glad!! I know that was embarrassing but really everyone just thought it was cute

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** yeah ik. also wtf is happening w luka and juleka

**WifiQueen:** not everyone appreciates his matchmaking

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** oof

**DJKing:** second casualty of the day after adrien

**WifiQueen:** the baffled king composing

**WifiQueen:** oof


	4. Who Would Win: A Powerful, Magical Monster Made of Deep Emotional Distress or One Pointy Boi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I post this chapter, I just wanted to say a big old THANK YOU! This thank you goes out to everyone who had commented on this fic!!! I've read all your comments more than once, and they mean a lot to me! If it hadn't been for that encouragement I never would've bothered to (very slowly) write this chapter. Sorry it took so long! I understand many of you may not even be reading anymore rip, but I still wanted to say it.
> 
> PrinceEric - Kim  
> ProGaymer - Max  
> DJKing - Nino  
> WifiQueen - Alya  
> PinkFairy - Rose  
> GottaGoFast - Alix  
> GingerBee - Sabrina  
> GentleGiant - Ivan  
> LeadActress - Mylene  
> Fashionista - Marinette  
> Adrien - Adrien  
> QueenBee - Chloe  
> LETSGOLESBIANS - Juleka  
> IHaveAnxietyJanet - Nathaniel  
> UrAnAllstar - Luka  
> SwordPan - Kagami

**Adrien** has added  **SwordPan** to  **The Gang Gets Akumatized**

**WifiQueen:** whose the new new person

**SwordPan:** while you were being heterosexual i studied the blade

**WifiQueen:** how dare you accuse me of being heterosexual

**SwordPan:** hm I like your class already, Adrien

**Adrien:** everyone this is Kagami, she’s in the fencing club with me! She’s really nice

**UrAnAllStar:** oh shit someone else who isnt actually in this class waddup

**SwordPan:** do I know you?

**UrAnAllStar:** probably not. I’m Luka, I’m in a band with some people in this class

**Adrien:** he’s really good!

**UrAnAllStar:** daw

**SwordPan:** Is this the one you think is hot, Adrien?

**Adrien:** NO

**WifiQueen:** KDJSHKJDHSKJ

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** It keeps happening...

**UrAnAllStar:** I HOPE I AM

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** Adrien you give me so much second hand embarrassment I'm going to die

**Adrien:** Think how I feel!

**GottaGoFast:** wait did anyone else hear that

**PrinceEric:** oh great there goes the akuma alarm

**Adrien:** g2g bye

**Fashionista:** also g2g!

**WifiQueen:** any bets they're kissing in some corner?

**QueenBee:** EXCUSE YOU

**WifiQueen:** You’re excused

**DJKing:** OH SNAP

**Fashionista:** lmao

**QueenBee is offline**

**Adrien:** That was kind of harsh…

**WifiQueen:** She deserved it.

**Adrien:** I mean yeah, probably, but that doesn’t mean you should do it.

**WifiQueen:** Ugh why do you have to be such a good person?

**SwordPan:** I suspect he’s just like that

**Fashionista:** It’s not a bad thing! Adrien is a sweetheart…

**UrAnAllStar:** Mhm ^

**DJKing:** I thought you two had to go? Where are you anyways?

**Fashionista:** right g2g bye

**Fashionista is offline**

**Adrien is offline**

**WifiQueen:** still betting on kissing in a closet. Sorry Luka

**UrAnAllStar:** Eh, they’re happy together so I’m happy for them

**DJKing:** daw, you’re a good dude

**UrAnAllStar:** ty. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m being evacuated because my classmate is the one that got akumatized

**PinkFairy:** D: stay safe!!!

**UrAnAllStar:** I will

**WifiQueen:** speaking of mysterious disappearances that may or may not involve kissing in closets, did anyone see marc or nath during that huge akuma attack a couple months ago?

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** uh

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** uh

**GottaGoFast:** oh they were hiding from everyone and cuddling. Didn’t even realize there was an akuma attack until afterwards

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** YOU ARE THE WORST BEST FRIEND

**DJKing:** if you promised not to tell you shouldn’t say it :(

**GottaGoFast:** he didn’t tell me. I’m the one who found them

**WifiQueen:** regardless, can we just take a moment to be glad Evillustrator and Reverser didn’t come back regardless of the reason? Cause those two were scary

**QueenBee:** EVILLUSTRATOR TRIED TO CUT ME IN HALF WITH A SAW

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** sorry

**Gaymer:** Your defensive reaction to having your crush mocked makes a good deal more sense now that I realize you’re bisexual.

**QueenBee:** . Is that why you were so upset?

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** ...that and embarrassment, yes

**QueenBee is offline**

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** That was weird

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** did I do something wrong?

**PrinceEric:** you're fine, she's just being Chloe

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** hhhhhhhhh

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** where are you?

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** art room. The akuma came in the classroom and we all had to run.

**WifiQueen:** I got some great footage!

**SwordPan:** where is it I have a sword

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** patrolling the halls I think

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** It is. I just snuck by it.

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** WHAT

**DJKing:** DUDE

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** my bf is distressed and I must go

**WifiQueen:** holy shit. Nath he's a keeper

**IHaveAnxietyJanet:** i know

**MotherfuckinRainbows:** okay I'm here

**IHaveAnxietyJanet is offline**

**MotherfuckinRainbows is offline**

**PinkFairy:** daw

 

Private message between  **UrAnAllStar** and  **LETSGOLESBIANS**

**UrAnAllStar:** IM GOING TO THROW MYSELF DIRECTLY AT THE AKUMA

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** THERE'S NO WAY MARINETTE AND ADRIEN ARE ACTUALLY OFF KISSING SOMEWHERE

**UrAnAllStar:** YOU DONT KNOW THAT

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** HIDE AND FIND THEM LATER

**UrAnAllStar:** OR I COULD PLAY A SICK GUITAR SOLO FOR WHAT APPEARS TO BE A WOOL MONSTER

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** AAAAAAAA

**UrAnAllStar:** AAAAAAAAAAAAA

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** IM GOING TO KILL YOU

 

**The Gang Gets Akumatized**

**WifiQueen:** wait a second, Kagami what did you say about having a sword?

**SwordPan:** exactly what I typed. I have a sword and I intend to fight the akuma

**PrinceEric:** WHAT

**SwordPan:** I don't care how magical it is I have a sharp object and years of training

**WifiQueen:** while you were busy being heterosexual I studied the blade?

**SwordPan:** exactly

**SwordPan is offline**

**Gaymer:** this plan has a 99% chance of failure

**WifiQueen:** she's gonna die

**Lead actress:** D:

**WifiQueen:** OKAY NVM SHE ACTUALLY GOT A HIT IN G2G RECORD

**WifiQueen is offline**

**DJKing:** I feel like if Alya wasn't as amazingly loyal as she is I would need to be concerned

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** Tell her to save my brother he's being a lovestruck idiot

**PinkFairy:** oh no!

**GottaGoFast:** oh great. Let me guess, some “I'm gonna bottle up my feelings so I don't hurt either of them” nonsense?

**PrinceEric:** I'll keep all my feelings right here and then one day I'll die

**GottaGoFast:** did you pick up john mulaney refs from nath?

**PrinceEric:** nah, ondine really likes him so we watched all the specials together.

**GingerBee:** that sounds...nice

**LeadActress:** im sure there's somewhere out there for you, Sabrina!

**GingerBee:** oh

**GingerBee:** ...thank you

**LeadActress:** :D!

**GottaGoFast:** ay I just heard lucky charm I think we're almost through this attack

**PrinceEric:** nice!

**GottaGoFast:** im gonna poke my head out and see if our new sword pan is dead

**GottaGoFast:** woooo not dead. She's been knocked down though and it looks like Chat Noire is carrying her to safety

**GottaGoFast:** there's the miraculous ladybug and now they're both hovering over someon oh God that's Luka

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** GDI

**GottaGoFast:** they're checking him for injuries but he doesn't look hurt so much as I can tell? they both look nervous too. weird.

**GottaGoFast:** and now Juleka is outside and glaring at him. Apparently he got distracted while texting her and the akuma got him. Poor akuma victim looks pretty guilty.

**GottaGoFast:** oh shit their timers are running out. Chat Noire shook Kagami's hand and then they both dashed

**UrAnAllStar is online**

**SwordPan is online**

**SwordPan:** there. handled.

**UrAnAllStar:** my head hurts and someone needs to come save me from my sister

**Adrien is online**

**Fashionista is online**

**Fashionista:** omw!

**Adrien:** I'll come too!

**LETSGOLESBIANS:** I am this (this) close to mcfreaking losing it

**Author's Note:**

> As someone with a sibling, I know...even if you love them, even if you get along well enough to be in a band together...sometimes you just gotta tell em to square up.


End file.
